Middleagedmum.com: flawless

Over the last couple of years, a number of new words have entered my vocabulary. Descriptions such as flawless complexion, oily T zone, even coverage, luminescence and defined contours, have become part of everyday kitchen table conversation in our house and I know more than I should, about how to achieve a kardashian smokey eye, matte nude lip or heavy scousebrow – note the beauty singular – it’s the same as the fashion singular – but applies only to the face and nails!

I kid myself that I am unaffected by this knowledge and am too intelligent/ feminist to care about these life changing products. Just because I live with a beauty expert with more knowledge than the campest man on the Mac counter in Selfridges/Andrea from Andreas Choice (hello, she’s the YouTube beauty Vlogger) doesn’t mean I have to buy into every new miracle cream/foundation that hits the shops – does it?

The teen manages to achieve flawless perfection on a daily basis, while I  generally feel like the sad spinster aunt, who’s make up routine is stuck somewhere in a 1979 convent (with ruddy nun cheeks). I am amazed at her attention to detail, devotion to perfection and the sheer number of hours she puts in to achieve her “look”  – and all on a normal school day – don’t even go there, if the girls are having a ‘night out’!!

We often disagree on how much is enough, as I am of the ‘less is more’ school of thought, while the 21st teenage girl is all about ‘more is more’. But hey, what the Hell do I know, I have never ever been high maintainance, my beauty routine involves Simple soap and moisturiser, then throwing all my make in the air and runnning under it, hoping some of it sticks in the right places!!

But while I don’t want to become a slave to my face, I also have no desire to turn into one of those bare faced, frizzy haired, middlegaged, Crocs with socks wearing mums, you see slobbing around parents night – I always wear my brightest red lipstick on parents night! Therefore recently, I’ve been paying a bit more attention to the beauty pages/ blogs advice on what products I should be buying to fill in my lines and achieve a luminous natural glow. So after reading in the Sunday Times, about the miracle cream Nanoblur, ‘the optical illusion that can smooth away a decade’, and ‘the complexion changing’ Dream Nude Airfoam Foundation from Maybelline, I dashed into Boots to buy them both. 

I fully intended to try them out straight away and post some before and after pics today, but this is a blog, not a glossy magazine and I had been at work, cooked dinner, fed the dog and talked about a biology exam, then I had a glass of red wine, so perfection was way down on my list of priorities. After all, I’m not Kris Kardashian!

But when I have a moment, I promise to do a full report (without video tutorial) and the teen has promised to help me!! Then you too, can achieve smooth, desk to dinner, ultimate perfection – with pentapeptides!


  • amanda says:

    When you tweeted this yesterday I read it too fast and thought it said ‘nan blur’, which is more up our street, let’s rename it. Ax

  • Susan Shippey says:

    I cannot wait for your review Jane! I too suffer from the ruddy nuncheeks (have done since I was a wee girl in Giffnock – remember?). Love your blog. Susan x

  • jill says:

    Can’t wait! Need all the help we can get, am currently trying out the Benefit Pore one, would be interested to see how they compare!
    Good luck

  • freethequay says:

    yes please, and then could you also trial some serious concealer that will deal with the dark shadows around the eyes which make me look utterly depraved when it’s only the result of a decade of sleep deprivation. laura mercier? nars? the new by terry is too heavy and I can’t find the old one….

  • Jude says:

    Boots on Baker St – SOLD OUT of Nanoblur!! Saw the Metro full page spread this morning with the (stated as ‘untouched’) before & after photos of real women, ie ones properly over 30. They haven’t all turned into teenagers but they do look healthier in the ‘after’ pics – as much as you can tell from newspaper-quality paper.

    Freethequay – I share the pain of purple under-eyes. Early nights make no improvement. Each morning for 30 yrs I’ve layered on concealer, trying as many different ‘miracle’ ones as poss but none are 100% effective. The closest I’ve come to is the Bobby Brown corrector that comes with concealer and matt trans powder (can’t remember the name). Its no miracle, but you can load it up without looking caked. Still looking for the answer that is not surgery though…..

  • illuminata says:

    I thought this was another PhotoShop spoof…

  • freethequay says:

    thanks for tip Jude will try

  • Jane says:

    Think we will contact some beauty PR’s and get some products for everyone to try. So we have foundation and under eye concealer on the list- anything else ladies?


  • Jude says:

    Brilliant idea Jane. Bags me & freethequays for the under-eye concealer!

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